So I know often I see and think things differently. So while I was walking this morning I saw this and the empty slot made me think of the missing student.
That missing student comes in various forms and with a variety of reasons.
The most obvious missing student is the one who is absent. The reasons they are missing span an area wider than the Sahara Desert. Maybe they are home sick, but that is just the tip of the iceberg. It maybe that they lack the confidence to face the assignment in class. Or maybe this student lacks the skills to face the bully. Sometimes the student hides in fear at home unable to attend class until the bruises can be hidden and the tears can be dried up. Often one is absent because at a young age they have had to take on an adult world-due to an absent parent who has abandon the family and is busy working to make ends meet. And there is even the possibility that they are missing just because the value of education is not recognized by them or the ones who care for them.
But what about the student whose physical body is in the classroom but they are missing. Once again the reasons why are wide. It maybe that they are the quiet one overshadowed by the squeaky wheel who needs some oil. Or maybe the child who has already mastered the concept who must wait in silence for their classmates to understand. Frequently it is the child who is lost to what is being taught because although they are at a different learning level they are required to struggle through often to the point of frustration at their instructional grade level. Sadly even sometimes maybe it is the student the teacher just can’t take anymore and no longer sees due to the frustration and stress the educational field has.
My prayer as a teacher is that the missing students in my classroom never go unseen and that I can meet them where they are with their needs.
One of the things those of you that have been following me know is that I have been trying to work on living the moment to the fullest. This is not something that comes easy to me as, I am a very detailed scheduler and often miss out on things because it isn’t on the agenda.
While out grocery shopping the other day, this book caught my eye. I took it off the shelf opened the front cover and read the first poem.
First I was dying to finish high school and start college.
And then I was dying to finish college and start working.
And then I was dying to marry and have children.
And then I was dying for my children to grow old enough so I could go back to my career.
And then I was dying to retire.
And now I am dying…
and suddenly realize that I forgot to live.
So I splurged on myself and spent $13 on myself because this book combined something I needed and something I loved.
When I was a little girl one of my greatest desires was to be a ballerina, unfortunately when I was 3 years old I suffered a significant injury to my left leg and according to the doctor was not allowed to dance. That is part of the reason I enjoy watching my daughter dance.
Daily Progress 2o minutes at a rate of 4mph.
No, I haven’t fallen off the face the Earth life has just been full of lots of crazy unexpected turns! I don’t want to make this a super long post so hope to over the next couple of day fill you in on all the unexpected turns.
First update has to do with my jogging progress. When I push myself, I can complete a mile in 11 minutes and 30 seconds. Without pushing it takes my about 12 minutes and 30 seconds. With the heat of the summer, I have not been doing the intervals of 1 minute walking and 1 minute jogging for the entire 3 miles. Instead I have been doing speed walking of 3.5 to 4.0 mph and throwing in a 1 mile interval a couple of times a week just to make sure I am maintaining a 11:30-12:30 mile. With the start of school, I have also added 20-30 minutes of elliptical each morning.
I met my first short-term goal – to get to 200 pounds! I meet that goal and exceed and maintain that goal for one month now. My last weigh in on August 1st I weigh 198 lbs. So I rewarded myself with a day at the spa with a facial and a full body massage. I haven’t been back to weigh in on the doctor scale but think I may be down to 196.
Thank you to all for their support and encouragement…46 more pounds to go!
Today’s journey 30 minutes at 3.0 mph.
The good: Due to the holiday I had my bi-weekly weigh in a little early. In nine days, I lost 1 pound. Yes ,I am happy about the lost and not a gain but hoped it would be a greater number. So now I am one pound away from my first short-term goal and a day at the spa.
The bad: I continued with the 1 minute jog and 1 minute walk intervals today, but lacked the motivational drive I had yesterday. The first mile 12:01 the second mile 13:06. The first I am okay with the second I am embarrassed at but at least i did it.
The tired: My body is trying to adjust to new medications, in addition to me working, and trying to enjoy summer. Anyone who knows me….knows that I am and always have been a burn the candle at both ends person who doesn’t know how to relax. For the past 3 mornings I have been waking up at 3:30 in the morning unable to fall back asleep. I am not usually a person who stops during the day, yet alone takes a nap. But today not only did I take 1 nap but I took 2. I am still feeling a bit tired but may take advantage and grab a few more naps to catch up on sleep this week.
About a week and a half ago, I was DONE! I was ready to retire my running shoes. Now by nature, I am not a quitter so I found it difficult to deal with my thoughts of stopping. I don’t know why I no longer wanted to do it…I was tired, frustrated, overwhelmed and a million other excuses.
It was then that I was reminded of the power of friends and encouragement. I appreciate those who are there helping me to better myself.
I am happy that over the last 2 weeks i have lost the 2 pounds I gained and an additional 2 pounds. I have only 2 pounds to go to reach my first goal. Once I lose those two pounds, I will reward myself with a day at the spa.
Due to Tropical Storm Debby, I did 30 minutes on the elliptical. I miss my jogs!
As of today, I am down 15 lbs. since March 13th. It has not been an easy thing to do but I have noticed not only a change in my physical appearance, but a change in my self-image of myself.
I have never been tiny, small, or little. Even as a small child, I remember when shopping for clothes that mine came from the “Pretty Plus” department. The thought that went through my mind was…What is pretty about being plus? And why is that remarks that people make are forever etched in your mind over 25 years later. Even those adults who think they are doing you good, by giving you advice about your weight.
When I started this journey, my weight was 10 pounds more than when I was nine months pregnant with the princess. I know that I have further to go on this journey but the steps I have taken have been beneficial. I have actually told myself a few times…Wow, you are looking good. You look nice! And other positive thoughts.
Once I lose 9 more pounds, I am going to treat myself to a day at the spa!
I should have known it wasn’t going to be a good jog/walk when every step I took I had to pull up my pants. Now I know this is a good problem to have but very irritating when trying to jog/walk. It was really hot and it felt as if an elephant was sitting on my chest. I wasn’t able to keep up the intervals of 2 minutes walking and 1 minute walking.
I did do 2.6 miles in 44:02. It would have been a shorter distance but once I had pushed myself to go that far, I had to go all the way back to where I parked the van.
Jogging 4 days in a row may have been pushing myself a bit too much. I will definitely take tomorrow off and then decide whether to run Friday night before doing the 5k Saturday morning.
I am registered for my first 5K since high school. My goal is to finish in 45 minutes.
Knowing that the race is just 5 days away, I decided to push through the migraine and hit the track in the 90 degree weather. I completed the 1st mile in 13:50 and the second 14:00…my best time ever! I wanted to do another mile but the nauseousness won and I had to call it a night.
So last night’s birthday celebration end with us at a pub doing karaoke. Where I decided to sing a song by one of my favorite artist, Reba McEntire called – Is There Life out There
She married when she was twenty
She thought she was ready
Now she’s not so sure
She thought she’d done some living
But now she’s just wonderin’
What she’s living for
Now she’s feeling that there’s something more
She’s always lived for tomorrow
She’s never learned how
To live for today
She’s dyin’ to try something foolish
Do something crazy
Or just get away
Something for herself for a change
There’s a place in the sun that she’s never been
Where life is fair and time is a friend
Would she do it the same as she did back then
She looks out the window and wonders again
Is there life out there
So much she hasn’t done
Is there life beyond
Her family and her home
She’s done what she should
Should she do what she dares
She doesn’t want to leave
She’s just wonderin
Is there life out there
Over the pass few weeks, as I have embarked on the journey from my couch to a half marathon, this song has brought such meaningful thoughts to mind and I have belted it to the top of my lungs on days that guilt creeps in because I am out pounding pavement instead of doing one of the million things I have written on my to – do list.
I have found there is life out there and I am working on be okay with having a life out there. Day’s like today make it easier to do that. I went back to the first place I ran when I opened this blog on March 18. I did my intervals of 2 minutes walking and 1 minute jogging to complete the same 1.8 path. The difference was on March 18th it took me 34 minutes to complete and today it only took me 27 minutes. What a thrill! My goal is to go back again May 20th and do 1.8 miles in 25 minutes.
Today, I experienced a good loss! I loss not only the 2 pounds that I had gained but also an additional 3lbs. I have a parent workshop to present at tonight for school so there will be no jog/walk, but I did the elliptical this morning and plan to do again when I get home. Although is it counterproductive to drink a margarita as I do it?
In thinking about loss, I thought how it is another of those words that can carry both positive or negative feelings. So to fairly present both sides here are my thoughts about negative loss….
It came as an unexpected surprise!
I didn’t fathom the depth of my need.
At first, I proceeded with great caution,
Soon my fingers latched tightly around it,
I fear my grasp may have been too much.
Before I can comprehend what happened,
I feel it begin to slip through my fingers…
Soon it is gone – a distant memory.
Did I ever really have it?
I wonder, “Can you lose what you never had?”